Like most new parents, some assumed that they’d instinctively know the best ways to raise their kids. Besides, others believe that parenting come naturally. But, most parents are wrong. Every parent has different styles on parenting and one might not agree with one’s technique while others might agree with you. That is why parenting can be complicated sometimes and can be rewarding at the same time. However, you have to take note that some of your parenting mistakes can have an impact to your children. So, before it’s too late, avoid these parenting mistakes now!
- Shouting and Getting Angry
Once you raise your voice or you yelled at your kids, this put them in flight or fight mode, which is the response of the body to stress. This also means that their logical brain will shut down and won’t hear you anymore. When children are in this mode, you could get angry at them and you would even shout, yet the message still won’t get through. So, typically, all lecturing done in such circumstances is a waste of one’s energy. Once they do comply with your requests, it would only be due to fear and it would have little impact on helping to boost their behavior for long-term. If you shout and be mad to try modifying your kid’s behavior, they will be less likely want to listen to you as well as cooperate. It could even damage the connection you have with them.
- Using Positive Reinforcement and Over-Praising
Using some praises like good girl and good boy or praising everything that your kids do well to reinforce good behavior is a common trait of parents. However, using evaluative praise as well as descriptively praising each behavior is a kind of reward that children will come to expect. For instance, according to research, it shows that children who are praised for sharing are likely to be less generous in the long run than the one who was not praised that way.
Even if you should make your kids accountable for all of their actions, there are more effective ways of achieving it than resorting to the fear and punishment tactics, especially if the kind of punishment is corpora. Based on research, it was found out that there’s a long list of the potential consequences of punishments to children. Kids who are punished on a regular basis will comply only with the instructions of their parents and would request because of fear, so the impact is short-term only. In long-term, punishments don’t only damage the connection and relationship of parents with their children, but also this could cause them to be resentful towards you. In some cases, they would learn how to lie as a way to avoid punishments in the future.
As a parent, what you should remember is that all kids need a more consistent and balanced approach to parenting and all of them have different emotional needs and it’s your responsibility to fulfill. That is the reason why it is very essential to try avoiding such common pitfalls to maximize the kid’s chances of growing up to be a self-reliant, happy, and responsible adult.